It's a huge mass of metal, cloth, plastic and who knows what else flying through a dark tunnel at high speed. The wind rushes before it, displaced like a wave of toothpaste being squeezed out of a tube. You hear the metal on metal screeching to a halt, opening its doors and disgorging the contents all over the platform and into the bowels of Toronto's transport system. The subway has arrived.
You'd think that we would appreciate the might and magistery of these massive machines, but in that frantic never-ending rush-hour-like jostling there is little time or energy to concentrate on their wonder.
It's in these cramped tunnels, deep below the earth that we meet the most fascinating creatures. An underground labyrinth filled to the brim twice a day with a mass of wide-eyed zombies stumbling off for another unproductive day in a miserable bureaucracy somewhere. It's the way they look through you; as if you don't exists, or they don't. That's how you know they've given up. They are caught in that an endless ping-ponging between some soulless position in the city, and some soulless hovel in the burbs. Each feeding into the other as its justification, neither giving much back.
Moving around in this subterranean world would be easier, except for those near-zombies that clump up together near the entrances and exits, like silt choking in a river. More commonly known as door knobs, they collect as do dust bunnies under a couch, gravitating towards what -- to them -- seems like the most convenient spot. Easily ignoring the pleas written in big bold letters on the doorways themselves to not block passage, they look indignant if someone ruffles them while trying to escape the train. Door knobs represent the most stubborn, yet only half-hearted zombies, because they still have hope that somehow their little position in life, in as much as it inconveniences all around them, is entitled. Blocking other people, so what?! The true zombies just shuffle into a respectable position in the center of the train.
The darkness in the tunnels may be eerie, yet nothing terrorizes in the depths quite a marauding packs of brats. Masses of screaming school kids, and shouting teachers, on their way to some extracurricular activity. Future zombies to be sure, but their exuberance sends ripples of lost and forgotten dreams through the weary denizens. It's like a rush of bad memories from days gone by, values that used to be intact, and that lost impractical belief that the world was not nearly as harsh and ugly as it turned out to be. Brat packs evoke old memories all while dishing out new headaches, a true terror worth avoiding whenever possible.
The metal whines and the speakers crackle with more inaudible noise announcing another delay on this badly managed mass transportation mess. Somewhere some administrator justifies the poor service, dirty cars, crowed people, all while traveling to and from work in their air-conditioned limo. You know they don't eat their own "dog food" so to speak, because if they did, after all of this time, they'd at least try to fix it in some way, rather than just allowing the slow decay that has set in over the decades. It's a testimony to yet another over-paid anonymous egotist that thinks their negative contribution has far more value than the rest of know its really worth.
Still, to save money, or the environment, or something possibly noble like that, millions of Torontonains venture into those depths on a regular basis. Most make it out in one piece, more or less. Big cities need big transport systems, and someday hopefully this city will get one too. Until then, we'll just have to plumb the depths, carefully avoiding the dangers that lurk there, once in a while catching a train that hasn't already exceeded the definition of overcroweded and dirty. Afterall, the system does manage to work once in a while.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Built-in
It was another long tiring day; I was on my way home from work, having first swung by the grocery store to purchase a couple of bags loaded with food. As I turned the corner onto my side-street, the woman walking in front of me approached a van precariously parked halfway on the road, and halfway on the sidewalk. It appeared to be loaded with people; you could see a video playing on a mounted little TV inside. The position of the vehicle was such that there was only enough room for one person to get between the van and a fence bordering an adjacent yard. Briefly I considered crossing the street, but seeing as I lived on this side, that seemed an awful long detour just to avoid an annoying obstacle.
The woman, middle-aged and carrying a bag containing several cartons of take-out food from one of the multitudes of neighboring restaurants, reached for the side door on the van, but realized that I was right behind her. Instead of opening the door, she turned sideways, allowing me to awkwardly pass.
All of that: the van parked on the sidewalk, packed full of people, the tired woman fetching food, was pretty much normal for the our area. It's a popular spot full of restaurants, which attract a large number of agitated type A people, so you get used to it.
Type A personalities, for those unfamiliar with that all too common distinction are aggressively "action-oriented" people who chase after results without concern for the consequences; the "just do it" crowd who believe that "done" mitigates the means. The ones that, as in this case, are far too busy accomplishing "stuff" to have to follow any silly, little things like "parking rules".
My encounter was yet another normal neighborhood occurrence happening at regular intervals, which typically would not have sparked any notice or burned itself into my memory. What changed this was that this particular woman, in a loud, unmistakably sarcastic (and almost hurt) voice said "you're welcome!", as I passed. Apparently, one could easily assert, she felt somewhat slighted by my not saying "thank you" in response to her effort of getting out of my way.
I had in fact started to mumble "thank you", but the better side of me caught my feeble attempt and stifled it. This woman, after all was brazenly violating the local parking laws, and most rudely blocking my way on the sidewalk with her van. I really had nothing to thank her for. A last minute attempt to redeem herself by not making me wait for her to hand the food to someone in the back of the van was not some huge gesture done for my concern. I was already there waiting, she was blocked by my presence.
I'm sure she was quite busy, and had rushed off to a restaurant to save time from cooking. Proper parking in our neighborhood is difficult, so it isn't unusual to see people breaking the rules. In fact it's so common that it's extremely irritating. Some people, I guess, just assume it's acceptable, despite the number of parking tickets being given out on a regular basis.
There are real parking spaces, and proper parking lots, but it's busy, they're slower and they often cost money. It's far easier just to plop your machine down in the middle of the sidewalk and block everything while you rush off and wait for food. Convenience is a big issue.
That, I think is the crux of this matter: one more A type, with an overcomplicated self-imposed rushed lifestyle, gratefully sharing their current inconveniences with me, as if somehow it should be my problem too. There are an awful lot of people who feel somehow justified in bending or breaking the rules in order to get things accomplished. More astonishing, they feel unabashedly owed the right to break the rules whenever they please, as if by some divine gift. Rules, that were clearly meant for lesser people. People like me.
This all too common scenario plays out often enough in big cities. Nature played a big joke on us by making us all intrinsically selfish, we often fall back on our instinct to survive. While it is necessary sometimes to act entirely for one's self interest, some people have managed to use this as an entire philosophy on how to live out their lives: constantly pushing on the boundaries.
To make it worse, these people usually ignore their own behavior, restarting the clock from some arbitrary time of their choosing. This woman, for example, was clearly offended by my rudeness, but seemed unable to grasp the concept that she had initiated that reaction. People are so consumed in their own issues, and by their need to flourish rather than to just survive, that they quickly forget about the rest of world around them.
Call it a simple flaw or just a quirk of our behavior; it may seem nearly trivial, but our self-centered nature is the driving force behind most of the world's problems. Occasionally the planet helps, but the true miseries of this world are brought by people, and particularly those people who believe that they are right. Action -- in a very strange way -- has become our single greatest problem, with all sorts of foolish people solving all sorts of unrealistic problems in very bad ways.
Most people want to do good, but too many people just want. And they make their place in this world at the expense of those around them, without care or concern for what they are really doing. What starts with little things quickly becomes the justification for all sorts of horrible behavior. The cause in this case, blocking the sidewalk to get food, was an act unlikely to be justified by the sheer busyness of the woman's life, no matter how important she thought she was.
Had she not been so aggressively looking for a conflict, I would have passed by that woman and her van full of kids, not giving it a second thought. Cities, which are always tight quarters, which means you have to forgive all sorts of trespasses on a regular basis. Sometimes we can't help stepping on a toe or two, particularly in a dense crowd.
It was her protestation -- an all together too common act in this world lately -- however that just seemed so above and beyond what her expectations should have been, that I was forced to take her into account. Did she have a point? Was I the one not behaving well? Should I have been more forgiving?
Overtime I've tried very hard to learn to pay as little attention to most people as possible. What used to pass for interest, often comes out now as just disappointment or frustration these days. If you watch enough people, read enough newspapers, and pay enough attention to the world you start to see the same horrible patterns repeating themselves over and over again. The only way to not let it constantly depress you, is to try to ignore it whenever possible.
Still, while trying not to let it in, I don't want it to drag me down either. The only way to fight rudeness is to be excessively polite. The only way to fight selfishness is to try whenever, and wherever possible to not let oneself be dragged down to that level. In time, we'll no doubt become less selfish as a species, but the true test of one's character is to be that way, most of the time, right now. It's the examples we set that matter, not how they respond.
So, in many ways that woman was correct. I should have said "thank you", but not as she might assume, because of her actions, but in spite of them. "They'll never learn if you don't ...", goes the counter-argument, but to be fair: they'll never learn anyways. Those people -- those more self-oriented members of our species -- are not going to change in their lifetime or mine, they'll dish out the same misery in their wake, no matter how people act around them. They are all lost causes at best, but we shouldn't allow them to use us to justify their lowly behavior.
And we shouldn't let that sway us from trying to be better than them. If we want to rise above, we have to do it with our actions not just our desires. The measure of our lives isn't the wealth we accumulate, the jobs we do, or the kids we breed, but it is actually the consequences we leave behind us. A good life lead by a good person, even one with few material rewards, is the greatest thing that any person can achieve, and these days it is achieved so rarely.
The woman, middle-aged and carrying a bag containing several cartons of take-out food from one of the multitudes of neighboring restaurants, reached for the side door on the van, but realized that I was right behind her. Instead of opening the door, she turned sideways, allowing me to awkwardly pass.
All of that: the van parked on the sidewalk, packed full of people, the tired woman fetching food, was pretty much normal for the our area. It's a popular spot full of restaurants, which attract a large number of agitated type A people, so you get used to it.
Type A personalities, for those unfamiliar with that all too common distinction are aggressively "action-oriented" people who chase after results without concern for the consequences; the "just do it" crowd who believe that "done" mitigates the means. The ones that, as in this case, are far too busy accomplishing "stuff" to have to follow any silly, little things like "parking rules".
My encounter was yet another normal neighborhood occurrence happening at regular intervals, which typically would not have sparked any notice or burned itself into my memory. What changed this was that this particular woman, in a loud, unmistakably sarcastic (and almost hurt) voice said "you're welcome!", as I passed. Apparently, one could easily assert, she felt somewhat slighted by my not saying "thank you" in response to her effort of getting out of my way.
I had in fact started to mumble "thank you", but the better side of me caught my feeble attempt and stifled it. This woman, after all was brazenly violating the local parking laws, and most rudely blocking my way on the sidewalk with her van. I really had nothing to thank her for. A last minute attempt to redeem herself by not making me wait for her to hand the food to someone in the back of the van was not some huge gesture done for my concern. I was already there waiting, she was blocked by my presence.
I'm sure she was quite busy, and had rushed off to a restaurant to save time from cooking. Proper parking in our neighborhood is difficult, so it isn't unusual to see people breaking the rules. In fact it's so common that it's extremely irritating. Some people, I guess, just assume it's acceptable, despite the number of parking tickets being given out on a regular basis.
There are real parking spaces, and proper parking lots, but it's busy, they're slower and they often cost money. It's far easier just to plop your machine down in the middle of the sidewalk and block everything while you rush off and wait for food. Convenience is a big issue.
That, I think is the crux of this matter: one more A type, with an overcomplicated self-imposed rushed lifestyle, gratefully sharing their current inconveniences with me, as if somehow it should be my problem too. There are an awful lot of people who feel somehow justified in bending or breaking the rules in order to get things accomplished. More astonishing, they feel unabashedly owed the right to break the rules whenever they please, as if by some divine gift. Rules, that were clearly meant for lesser people. People like me.
This all too common scenario plays out often enough in big cities. Nature played a big joke on us by making us all intrinsically selfish, we often fall back on our instinct to survive. While it is necessary sometimes to act entirely for one's self interest, some people have managed to use this as an entire philosophy on how to live out their lives: constantly pushing on the boundaries.
To make it worse, these people usually ignore their own behavior, restarting the clock from some arbitrary time of their choosing. This woman, for example, was clearly offended by my rudeness, but seemed unable to grasp the concept that she had initiated that reaction. People are so consumed in their own issues, and by their need to flourish rather than to just survive, that they quickly forget about the rest of world around them.
Call it a simple flaw or just a quirk of our behavior; it may seem nearly trivial, but our self-centered nature is the driving force behind most of the world's problems. Occasionally the planet helps, but the true miseries of this world are brought by people, and particularly those people who believe that they are right. Action -- in a very strange way -- has become our single greatest problem, with all sorts of foolish people solving all sorts of unrealistic problems in very bad ways.
Most people want to do good, but too many people just want. And they make their place in this world at the expense of those around them, without care or concern for what they are really doing. What starts with little things quickly becomes the justification for all sorts of horrible behavior. The cause in this case, blocking the sidewalk to get food, was an act unlikely to be justified by the sheer busyness of the woman's life, no matter how important she thought she was.
Had she not been so aggressively looking for a conflict, I would have passed by that woman and her van full of kids, not giving it a second thought. Cities, which are always tight quarters, which means you have to forgive all sorts of trespasses on a regular basis. Sometimes we can't help stepping on a toe or two, particularly in a dense crowd.
It was her protestation -- an all together too common act in this world lately -- however that just seemed so above and beyond what her expectations should have been, that I was forced to take her into account. Did she have a point? Was I the one not behaving well? Should I have been more forgiving?
Overtime I've tried very hard to learn to pay as little attention to most people as possible. What used to pass for interest, often comes out now as just disappointment or frustration these days. If you watch enough people, read enough newspapers, and pay enough attention to the world you start to see the same horrible patterns repeating themselves over and over again. The only way to not let it constantly depress you, is to try to ignore it whenever possible.
Still, while trying not to let it in, I don't want it to drag me down either. The only way to fight rudeness is to be excessively polite. The only way to fight selfishness is to try whenever, and wherever possible to not let oneself be dragged down to that level. In time, we'll no doubt become less selfish as a species, but the true test of one's character is to be that way, most of the time, right now. It's the examples we set that matter, not how they respond.
So, in many ways that woman was correct. I should have said "thank you", but not as she might assume, because of her actions, but in spite of them. "They'll never learn if you don't ...", goes the counter-argument, but to be fair: they'll never learn anyways. Those people -- those more self-oriented members of our species -- are not going to change in their lifetime or mine, they'll dish out the same misery in their wake, no matter how people act around them. They are all lost causes at best, but we shouldn't allow them to use us to justify their lowly behavior.
And we shouldn't let that sway us from trying to be better than them. If we want to rise above, we have to do it with our actions not just our desires. The measure of our lives isn't the wealth we accumulate, the jobs we do, or the kids we breed, but it is actually the consequences we leave behind us. A good life lead by a good person, even one with few material rewards, is the greatest thing that any person can achieve, and these days it is achieved so rarely.
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Waste
The really stupid thing is that even if they succeed, which is extremely rare, terrorists that bring the world down around them always end up replacing it with something more hideous, more evil. Their means defines their being, which generally places them deep in the sewage with the other lessor humans, a pool for all those creatures that failed to make the leap from animal to person.
And worse yet, are the fanatical ones, whose own simplistic selfishness deludes them into thinking that their deranged view on the world could somehow improve others lives, rather than as is clearly obvious, make them more miserable. The world is always far from perfect, but it takes a truly dense malevolent being to believe that more rules, strictly enforced and less freedom will do anything but pour fuel on that fire.
It's even hard to believe that some of these people are swayed by martyrdom, or some moronic lie about a harem of virgins in the afterlife, causing them to trade their one and only real possession, their life, for a foolhardy chance to ruin the world for everyone else. The idiocy here is sub-human.
We all sense the world is out of control and many of us want the honor of fixing it, but random acts of terror only contribute to the problem. Even a successful revolution, one that sweeps thought the population and purges all the nay sayers, is nothing more than collected evil, with a nasty purpose. Violent revolution is always bad. It's just too many selfish people trying to take the easy way out, instead of fixing the problems around them. It's stupid and cowardice, and ultimately history always looks down poorly on all of those involved, whether they think they've won or not.
Terrorists, no matter what the outcome, sit in the depths with the worst of humanity including tyrants, serial killers and warmongers. These people all trade their own satisfaction for the misery of others, the very worse trait a human can posses.
And worse yet, are the fanatical ones, whose own simplistic selfishness deludes them into thinking that their deranged view on the world could somehow improve others lives, rather than as is clearly obvious, make them more miserable. The world is always far from perfect, but it takes a truly dense malevolent being to believe that more rules, strictly enforced and less freedom will do anything but pour fuel on that fire.
It's even hard to believe that some of these people are swayed by martyrdom, or some moronic lie about a harem of virgins in the afterlife, causing them to trade their one and only real possession, their life, for a foolhardy chance to ruin the world for everyone else. The idiocy here is sub-human.
We all sense the world is out of control and many of us want the honor of fixing it, but random acts of terror only contribute to the problem. Even a successful revolution, one that sweeps thought the population and purges all the nay sayers, is nothing more than collected evil, with a nasty purpose. Violent revolution is always bad. It's just too many selfish people trying to take the easy way out, instead of fixing the problems around them. It's stupid and cowardice, and ultimately history always looks down poorly on all of those involved, whether they think they've won or not.
Terrorists, no matter what the outcome, sit in the depths with the worst of humanity including tyrants, serial killers and warmongers. These people all trade their own satisfaction for the misery of others, the very worse trait a human can posses.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)